sifar...

tum ishq bhi
panaah bhi
sukoon bhi
jahaan bhi
kabhi aankhein bhar aayein to
ashq me chhipa samaa bhi
us ret ke baadal me lipti
anchahi lehron ka jahaan bhi
aur har simt chalti meri saanson ki
pal pal kehti dastaan bhi
main pyasa tum pyaala
main mureed tum rehnuma bhi
zindagi ke is caaravan me
tum manzil tum raasta bhi....

vo...

usse sapne dekhna pasand hai
mujhe sapnon me vo..
usse barish pasand hai
mujhe baarish me vo..
usse hasna pasand hai
mujhe hanste hue vo..
usse ye sab pasand hai
mujhe pasand hai to itne sab me sirf vo.....

incessant incinerator...

the incessant incinerator...
bleeds me pleads me
burns me n resurrects me
relieves me from this agony
bereaves me from this untold story

the incessant incinerator...
tells me maladies
of days that were 
and times that'll be
of my incompetent existence 
and of this precocious entity
within me...

the incessant incinerator...
has a say
in what i do
what i feel
when im hurt 
it makes it heal
when im sad
it makes me cry 
it teaches me never to let go
of another try

im searchin for it
looking all around
alas! my efforts are futile
i cant find the perpetuator
a peep into my heart
and i know
YOU are my INCESSANT INCINERATOR...

requiem..silence..static...

this world is a dreary place..i wanna leave it for good..underground seems a better option for me..without a sound as i lay down on the moist earth..the irregular support gives me a tingy feeling..like acid falling on the sweet nectar of a daffodil..my back burns ..my body yearns for that one drop of life giving solution..but my mind is at peace..i hear a hissing sound..the sound comes from somewhere..somewhere deep inside me..as the roots of my body engage in silent conflict to gain supreme control..this little heart of mine hisses away in its plight and sorrow..in search of divination it lunges to come out of my earthy remains..to beat freely..beat in an air of sanctity and purity..chiselling its way thru my chest it tries its best to free itself from the shackles of mortal existence..for a greater cause..i have to let it go..its destination too far and its cause too noble..

i hear voices..abstract..barely audible..like chants from a satanic cult..hooded dementors line up in front of my eyes..ready to take the last of me from myself..

my heart frees..i was never yours..never meant to be..i beat for someone else..i cant be with you it says..

i lay there speechless..devoid of words..an eerie silence engulfs the place..the voices are more distinct nw..i am ready..for the last embrace..for the last step..

and then i rise..never to fall again..i see bright lights..candles burning in the mid of the night..glaciers melting at the tip of the ice..a supermassive black hole..is this death, nirvana or resurrection..i feel one with him, with nature, with the mountains , the trees, the virgin seashores, like pellets, my body breaks and i become one with the ONE..the requiem goes on..silence prevails..and its all static for ME..

and..all i want is to disappear...

Dil to bachha hai ji.....!!..

He stands in silence
In the middle of nowhere..
Lost in sweet nothingness..in search of divinity..
The darkness wasnt his aide
nor was this emptiness his desire..
He didnt choose it ..

A boy had become a man this day..
the truth of life had been uncovered
an uncouth feeling drenched him
like the blissful rain
He had lost..something
somethin that he desired
that he had lived for
cherished in his dreams
and nurtured with his tears and sleepless nights
fathomless and cruel
destined to be grilled
in the mills of selfishness and insanity

this man had learnt a lot
someday gettin high meant on a swing
drinkin meant milk
love was mama's hug
dad's shoulder was the highest place on earth
his worst enemies were his siblings
the only thing that cud hurt was skinned knees
the only things broken were toys and knuckle bones
and goodbyes meant only till tomorrow..

See how time changes..

But still somewhere..lost within his existence
that small child yearns to come out
roam freely in the fields of delight
plucking happiness from trees
holding his dad's hand while crossing that busy street
cuddling up to mom for his chocolates and bedtime stories

somewhere
the innocence is still there
the desire still alive
there is still a child
deep down in his heart
somewhere

after all..
dil to bachha hai ji...

Confessions of a broken heart.....

This Trauma Is Colder than life...
But Then Where Would It End...
This rupture brought by your Knife Of Loving Sins...
Precocious With Life, Yet So Internally Lost Within...
Your hate Seeps Eternally On an Ahin Veil Of Skin...
I'm Sad,....,
Sad Like Butterflies Pinned To Cardboard Boxes...
Sad Like Books With Torn pages.., Ocean Shores Empty of Bathers...
I Am Sad Like Unfinished Stories... Where Would I go With All This..., yet To live Alone!.......

Till then i succumb to ur pain...,
Die in ur arms...,
Feel ur breath that one last time...,

Till I rise again...
Like a phoenix...
From the ashes...........

THE PLEDGE

Trained,pushed and tested....
In SWEAT...,
In BLOOD...,
Till all that is left is...,
HONOR, COURAGE
& COMMITMENT
to a BROTHERHOOD
& a FREEDOM
that no MAN,
can take away from US...,
through PAIN,
our STRENGTH grows...
and BATTLE,
our GLORY rises...
BORN, BRED...
for the days of WAR...
I am the INDIAN SOLDIER...
and FIGHTING is my DHARMA....